When You Can No Longer Care for Your Love One

As a dedicated son or daughter, husband or wife, you hope that you never need to put your loved one in a long-term care facility. You do all that you can to help your loved one live with Alzheimer’s disease. Protecting and caring for that individual is a part of your life everyday, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Even though you are devoted to your loved one and might even have promised that person that he or she never would have to live in a long term care community, the time might come when, in fact, it becomes necessary for your family member to move out of your home. You are likely to struggle and agonize over this decision. Even if you decide it is what is best for your loved one and for your entire family, you probably still will feel guilty.

When telling loved ones that you can no longer care for them on their own, they might become angry with you. They also might not understand, and become very sad or agitated. This is to be expected. But you must do what is best for everyone involved, even if the decision is emotional, and even if experience feelings of guilt.

Should that dreaded day come when you must move a loved one to a facility that cares for Alzheimer’s patients, keep in mind that you probably are doing what is best. There are many valid reasons for making this decision, even if it is the last thing you ever want to do.

There might be financial reasons as to why you no longer can care for your loved one. During the hours when you are away at work, you might need to pay for a private duty nurse or aide, which can become very expensive. The expenses related to your loved one’s everyday care also could become rather costly. If your loved one needs a high level of care, you likely are missing time from work. If this happens to often, you could be risking your job or losing out on pay that you cannot afford to lose.

When caring for a family member with Alzheimer’s disease, you might be seeing a progression of the disease. If the disease becomes too bad, it might be overwhelming for you to continue providing care. You might not be able to provide all the safety and care that your loved one needs. In cases like this, it might be better for your family member to live in a safe community with caregivers who specialize in Alzheimer’s disease.

Spouses of individuals with Alzheimer’s disease often have their own unique challenges. These individuals often are aging as well and sometimes can have declining health. It may be too difficult for you as a spouse to continue to care for your loved one. Continuing to care for a spouse with Alzheimer’s could put your own health at greater risk. Again, if you are not as strong or as well as you once were, you might not be able loved one.

Alzheimer’s disease impacts more people than the individual who is ill and his or her caretakers. Children in the family frequently have a difficult time when a loved one has Alzheimer’s disease. For this reason, it is important to help kids adjust to the changes they will see in the person they love, who often is a grandparent or great grandparent.

The children in your family might act out if you are spending a good deal of time with the Alzheimer’s patient. This is especially true if your family member has moved into your home. Young children may not understand that you must spend a lot of time giving care to the sick adult. In such cases, kids might feel neglected and maybe even forgotten at times.

It may help if you talk to your children before moving grandma or grandpa into the home with you. Explain that the grandparent is experiencing some health problems and needs lots of extra tender love and care.

Believe it or not, children will understand that the family member is ill. If they are old enough to have a better understanding of the disease, you can provide them with more information about Alzheimer’s. Share with your children how the disease might affect your loved one, as it progresses. Let them know that they likely will see changes in the personality of the grandparent or other family member.

Make certain that children understand how Alzheimer’s disease will affect the grandparent’s memory. Explain that Grandma or Grandpa might not remember who they are. It is essential that you explain this to your children in an attempt to ensure that their feelings are not hurt or that they are not frightened by the changes that might occur.

When a family member has Alzheimer’s disease, the children in the family often feel isolated from the person they love. Although they may be unable to help with the daily care of the family member with Alzheimer’s, children can help in other ways. By spending time with the Alzheimer’s sufferer, children can help that person to feel safer and more secure.

You should encourage your children to spend more time with the family member. You should all spend time together as a family as well. Just being together will help everyone to adjust better to the many changes, which are taking place in the home.

Parents can help children put their fears about Alzheimer’s disease at ease, although this can be especially challenging when dealing with young children. A younger child might become afraid that he or she might get Alzheimer’s one day or that you will. Kids sometimes think that all illnesses are contagious, and therefore, fear the unknown. This certainly is among the best reasons to educate your children about Alzheimer’s disease.

And it isn’t just the younger children in the family who might become confused. Parents should not assume that teenage children are able to handle the changes without help. Older children, too, might need further education about Alzheimer’s disease to improve their understanding of what is taking place in the mind of their loved one. Teenagers as well as younger children often feel as if they are not having enough time spent with them.

But again, you can encourage your teenagers to spend time with the family member with Alzheimer’s in order for them to feel more involved in helping with the care of the individual whom they love.